Emotional IntelligenceSep 17, 2021
Did you know I was going back to school? Yikes!!!
Our church has a college, and I am working to complete the certificate program. I joke about it, but I am actually really excited because when I am accountable to people, I am so much more consistent and do more than I could do on my own.
Are you like that? Do you get more done on your own or with accountability?
This first month, we are reading a book called Emotional Intelligence by Travis Bradberry.
I knew this would be a book and a class that would stretch me because as I listened to the book on audible, I could identify with the people and leaders who scored low. And that is not a good thing. But I feel very hopeful because Emotional Intelligence is something you can change, unlike your DNA, personality, or IQ.
However, I also know change is hard, so it will be a good but needed journey. There are ups, downs, and setbacks in every life journey, but the goal is to keep moving forward.
I think the first thing that I will be working on is noticing my emotions, not judging them, and pushing them aside, “because I shouldn’t feel that way,” but noticing them. Then I want to put the correct emotional word to how I am feeling. Am I really angry, or am I just fearful? Am I really sad, or am I feeling rejected? To know what my emotions are telling me, I have to know what emotion I am feeling.
I will also be looking at my triggers. I don’t know that I have ever really sat down and asked myself why “that” triggered me. If I can figure out my triggers and get ahead of them, I can stop the reactions, and maybe it will be nearly impossible for me to be triggered one day. The book did say we can change our Emotional Intelligence.
A few years ago, I read the book “How We Love.” That was the first time I realized there are so many different types of emotions. I pretty much thought you were happy, sad, or mad, and that was it. After reading the book, I started looking at my emotions and examining my feelings. Then I started noticing where I felt it in my body—truly allowing myself all the feels. And giving myself the freedom to just feel and not have to act on them.
But if we don’t make time to work on ourselves, we will go back to our old habits (maybe not all the way back) and stop doing things that are healthy for us.
The book Emotional Intelligence has reminded me to stop and really examine what I am feeling and why. But then to also process where I feel it in my body and what I need to do now to move forward in a healthy way.
I can tell that I am going to love going back to school and learning how to be a better me, which will affect me, my marriage, my family, my ministry, my friendships, everything - a better emotional me will make everything in my life better.
How about you? Do you need to grow in your Emotional Intelligence? If so, what are you doing to grow?
Emotional Intelligence - Travis Bradberry
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